General Chat

Good morning :-)


This and That……..The Bible and those bloopers!

THE WICKED BIBLE: of 1631 reported the Seventh Commandment as "Thou shalt commit adultery," a mistake that infuriated King Charles. He ordered all copies destroyed and fined all printers whose hands had touched the edition.

MURDER'S BIBLE: This 19th-century faux pas had Mark 7:27 as "Let the children be killed" instead of "filled."

PLACEMAKER BIBLE: a 16th Century printer had Jesus blessing the "place-makers" instead of "peacemakers."

VINEGAR BIBLE: The Vinegar Bible gets its name from the most famous of the errors in the 1717 printing. The headline of Luke 20 reads, “the parable of the vinegar” (instead of vineyard).

Thank you Father for making yourself known to us, showing us the way of salvation through faith in your Son. We ask you now to teach us through your word, so that we may be ready to serve you, for the glory of our Lord Jesus Christ. Amen.

Cx :-)

Hello all

Interesting as always Cynthia. Thank you.

Hard to believe that we are in the month of May!

May this new month of the year bring you joy and
happy times ahead.

Sending hugs out to all who need them.

Good morning :-)

A week of This and That

Did you know?

THE BIBLE
• …..was written by around forty different people from different backgrounds.
• …..was written during a period of 1,600 years. That’s about forty generations.
• …..was the first book ever printed in 1456.
• ….. is the most sold and most translated book in the world and the most shoplifted.

Since 1456 there have been many translations of the Bible, not only into different languages, but in content. Note the following misprints in these old translations – more to follow tomorrow!


CAMELS BIBLE: In 1832 an edition had Rebekah leaving her tent to meet Isaac with a group of - not damsels - but camels.

WIFE-HATER BIBLE: An 1810 version read, "If any man come to me, and hate not . . . his own wife (instead of “life"), he cannot be my disciple."

"SIN ON" BIBLE: The first English-language Bible to be printed in Ireland, in 1716, encouraged its readers to "sin on more" rather than "sin no more." A similar error in 1653 had declared: "Know ye not that the unrighteous shall inherit the kingdom of God?"


“Blessed Lord, who hast caused all holy Scriptures to be written for our learning: Grant that we may in such wise hear them, read, mark, learn, and inwardly digest them, that by patience and comfort of thy holy Word we may embrace, and ever hold fast, the blessed hope of everlasting life, which thou hast given us in our Saviour Jesus Christ.


Cx :-)

Good morning :-)

The first Monday in May became a public holiday in England, Wales and Northern Ireland in 1978. In Scotland, it had already been one of the original bank holidays since 1871.

Britain has a long heritage of May Day celebrations dating back to pagan times that still have echoes in such customs as the Maypole Dancing and Morris Dancing. Down through the centuries May Day has been associated with fun, revelry and perhaps most important of all, fertility.

In rural Britain, celebrations were associated with the fertility of spring and the start of summer. The seeds of the new crops had been planted, farm labourers were given a day off - and they made the most of it!

However, this holiday was brought in as a way of marking the International Labour day by the socialist government of the time.

Have a relaxing day everyone.

Cx :-)

Good morning :-)


The Collect (special prayer) for today

Almighty Father,
who in your great mercy gladdened the disciples
with the sight of the risen Lord:
give us such knowledge of his presence with us,
that we may be strengthened and sustained by his risen life
and serve you continually in righteousness and truth;
through Jesus Christ your Son our Lord,
who is alive and reigns with you,
in the unity of the Holy Spirit,
one God, now and for ever. Amen


The Gospel reading tells the lovely story of Jesus and his disciples having breakfast on the beach. John 21 1-19

Cx :-)

Good morning :-)

Lord, give me a sense of humour,
a spirit that is light.
So when I feel the darkest,
my heart will sparkle bright.

Let me learn to giggle,
when something tickles me.
Like my baby grandson,
when I bounce him on my knee.

Let me learn to chuckle,
like I did when I was a little girl.
Even when life's tangles,
are pulled through my thinning curls.

Let me learn to laugh aloud,
even if only to myself.
Like when a child is playing,
with no one but them self.

Let me learn to smile,
when I prefer to wear a frown.
Like a toddler thick in mischief,
and they think no one is around.



Psalm 126:2

Then our mouth was filled with laughter
And our tongue with joyful shouting;
Then they said among the nations,
“The Lord has done great things for them.”


Cx :-)

Good morning :-)

There's always room for laughter in church and children can cause a lot of amusement at times. Children aren't just the church of the future, they are part of the church now.

An associate minister visited our Sunday school class one morning, and asked, "What would you like me to talk about?" One child spoke up boldly and said, "About 3 minutes!"


Sunday school teacher asked Little Johnny, "Do you believe in the Devil?" "No," said Little Johnny. "It's the same as Santa Claus. I know it's my daddy."



“Dad, I want to ask you a question,” said little Josh after his first day of Sunday School.
“Of course,” said his Dad.
“The teacher was reading the Bible, about the Children of Israel building the Temple, the Children of Israel crossing the Red Sea, the Children of Israel aking the sacrifices,” said Josh.
“So what’s your question?” his Dad asked.
“Well, didn’t the grown-ups do anything?!”

Cx :-)

Good morning :-)

There's always room for laughter in church...


A vicar explained to his congregation that the church was in need of some extra money, so he asked them to consider being more than generous, offering whoever gave the most money the chance to pick three hymns.

After the offering plates were passed about the church, the vicar glanced down and noticed that someone had graciously offered up a total of £1,000. He was so excited that he immediately shared his joy with his congregation and said he’d like to personally thank the person who placed the money in the plate.

A very quiet, elderly, saintly lady in the back of the church shyly raised her hand. The pastor asked her to come to the front, so she slowly she made her way towards him.
The vicar told her how wonderful it was that she gave so much, and in thanks he asked her to pick out three hymns.

Her eyes brightened as she looked over the congregation. She pointed to the three most handsome men in the church and said: “I’ll take him and him and him.”


Cx :-)

Good morning :-)

Humour in church............

Money plays an important part in the life of a church if we wish to keep the doors open and the mission ongoing.


A minister was preoccupied with thoughts of how he was going to ask the congregation to come up with more money than they were expecting for repairs to the church building.

So, he talked to the organist to see what kind of inspirational music she could play after the announcement about the finances to get the congregation in a giving mood.

"Don't worry," she said. "I'll think of something."

During the service, the minister paused and said, "Brothers and Sisters, we are in great difficulty; the roof repairs cost twice as much as we expected, and we need to raise another £5,000. Any of you who can pledge £100 or more, please stand up."

Just at that moment, the organist started playing The National Anthem.


Cx :-)

Good morning :-)



And then, there’s the weddings……………………

The bride and her father arrived at the church door. The bride was, understandably, nervous and confessed to her Maid of Honour that she was worried she’d completely forget what to do.

“You’ve just got to remember three things,” said her friend. “First, walk nice and straight down the aisle. Second, stop and stand when you get to the altar. And third, sing along with the hymn: it’ll relax you.”

So as the bride arrived at the wedding, she was heard muttering to herself over and over again: “AISLE ALTAR HYMN”, “AISLE ALTAR HYMN”…’

:-D :-D :-D :-D :-D


Cx :-)

Good morning :-)

We have left the solemnity of Lent behind us and have celebrated Easter, so maybe time for a little laughter.

Take for instance…….baptisms – you never know what little ears pick up.

After a rainstorm filled all the potholes in the streets and alleys, a young mother watched her two little boys playing in the puddle through her kitchen window. The older of the two, a five year old lad, grabbed his sibling by the back of his head and shoved his face into the water hole. As the boy recovered and stood laughing and dripping, the mother runs to the yard in a panic.

"Why on earth did you do that to your little brother?!" she shouts in pure fright..

"We were just playing 'church' mummy," he said. "I was baptising him in the name of the Father, the Son and in the hole-he-goes."


Cx :-)

Hello all

Sunny but with a chilly breeze today.

Lovely to see all the St George's Day flags in the village on my way to church this morning.

Ongoing prayers for the Russia/Ukraine war.

Good morning :-)

A beautifully sunny Sunday morning...................... <3


Today is known traditionally, as Low Sunday - possibly the contrast between the high festival of Easter last week.

The Collect (special prayer) for today :



The Collect (special prayer) for today:

Almighty Father, you have given your only Son to die for our sins and to rise again for our justification: grant us so to put away the leaven of malice and wickedness that we may always serve you in pureness of living and truth; through the merits of your Son Jesus Christ our Lord, who is alive and reigns with you, in the unity of the Holy Spirit, one God, now and for ever. Amen.


Today’s gospel tells the story of the disciple who became known as Doubting Thomas. (John 20. 19-to end)


Cx :-)

Good morning :-)


Easter – new life.

Holy Week and Easter are complete. We have shared in prayer and memory the sufferings of Jesus, his death and resurrection. We rejoice at the faith that allows us to look towards him in sorrow and joy – and to share God’s love as he did. Holy Week and Easter are complete when we share blessings with others.

God gives us a world to share. We belong to one another and to God with Jesus: standing near the cross and believing in the resurrection.

Cx :-)

Good morning :-)

Thanks for your post kandj, I had put birthday greetings to the Queen elsewhere, but omitted to do so here........sigh.


Easter - new life

A lot of people have been busy with their gardens or planters, getting ready for a lovely display of flowers and plants. Some of these will have been grown from a bulb in the darkness of the soil. They need the daylight, sunshine and rain to fee and nurture them. Those bulbs promise a miracle of new life and will be beautiful, not just because we have cared for them, but because God designed them to be beautiful.

Our natural world has been created by the God we worship, it has been created with its own harmony and rhythm. We do not need a microscope to admire its unseen beauty, but if we do have a microscope, we can be even more amazed by the intricacy and detail of each individual plant as we sometimes see on nature programmes.

Our Easter hymns express our faith and hope not just in the past, but in the future. Jesus died, and was buried, and hope seemed gone but, on that glorious day we sing ‘Jesus Christ is risen today’….Alleluia.


Cx :-)

Hello all

Warm and sunny but cold in the shade today.

Lots of pretty butterflies and bees around here.

Happy birthday to H M our Queen, an inspiration to so many including me.

Good morning :-)

This lovely weather just lifts the spirits.......agreed!


Easter – New Life

The change from a larva, a worm like creature, to a lifeless looking chrysalis, to the emergence of a magnificent, winged butterfly has often been used as a symbol of the resurrection.

The butterfly begins as a tiny egg. From the egg, a larva emerges. The larva eats and grows and eventually forms a chrysalis. For days, as it grows, it remains quiet inside a delicate shell. Then, it emerges as a fully developed butterfly. After pumping fluid into its wings, that amazingly different looking insect takes flight.

We are earthbound creatures with limited views of what the future might bring. Christ promises us a new body which will not know the limitations we have now. The butterfly symbolizes this change from an earthbound creature into a new form.


Cx :-)

Hello all

Amen to your words this morning Cynthia.

A beautiful sunny God-given day here today.

Springtime....... a new season
Warm weather
Brighter evenings and longer days.
Pretty flowers around to lift our spirits.

Happy Wednesday blessings everyone.

Good morning :-)


Easter Reflections

With OUR EYES we see
The beauty of Easter
as the earth awakens once more...

With OUR EARS we hear
The birds sing sweetly
to tell us Spring again is here...

With OUR HANDS we pick
the golden daffodils
and the fragrant hyacinths...

But only with OUR HEARTS
can we feel the MIRACLE of GOD'S LOVE
which redeems all men...

And only with OUR SOUL
can we make our 'pilgrimage to God'
and inherit His Easter Gift of ETERNAL LIFE.


Cx :-)

Good morning :-)

Easter - New Life

Why do most people come alive in spring? It marks the season of new life.

There's a huge stirring in the garden too. It’s amazing how plants respond to the increasing light levels. After the cold and dark of winter, signs of new life begin to emerge. The sights, sounds and smells bring us hope and cheer as more light and warmth encourages unfurling leaves and colourful plants.

Along the roads, we can see the first flowers of spring in gardens and green spaces, bringing vibrant yellows, pinks, purples and blues amid vivid green and white. Just beautiful.


Dear Heavenly Father, thank you for the wonderful season of spring. During this lovely time, I ask You for a fresh beginning in each of our hearts. Please allow each of us, as Christians, to bloom in Your world, just as the flowers are blooming. Help us to be witnesses whenever there is an opportunity, and to be followers of Your word every day. We ask this in Your name. Amen.


Cx :-)