General Chat

can you!!!! don't do much lager-don't mind the odd bottle of grolsh mind I'd drink it if there was nowt else. catherine xx

* Waits by the third door to the left* *notices everyone else waiting by the second door to the right* *waves and smiles*

catherine i can smell lager

THIS IS BIG BROTHER JEAN POOL YOU ARE ABOUT TO FALL INTO THE JACUZZI PLEASE MOVE ACROSS TO YOUR LEFT FOR YOUR OWN SAFETY

*Jean turns to door on the right* Am I going the right way big bruver?

Woohoo! Packs luxury items: Patches as quit smoking Make Up Hairdryer Hair Spray Totty shoes Must pack these into me trolly dolly case, thongs, mini skirts, skimpy tops, bikini, shower gel and a little something for the weekend! Totters off to house

Right come on lets get this over with- hey puss you think they got some champers or what. catherine xx

Sorry big brother I was busy posing for the photographers. That security guard is a big lad aint he lol Jackiexx

Grins gormlessly, sorry big bruver

hope she dont find my mobile up my bottom

*voice on tannoy* HELLO THIS IS BIG BROTHER COULD ALL HOUSEMATES PLEASE ASSEMBLE BY THE DOUBLE DOORS TO YOUR LEFT FOR YOUR SECURITY CHECKS

Right I'm having that one the double- jumps on bed........yipppeeeee catherine xx

Bagsy the single bed by the door.

Yep that was always going to be the way i was going to do it Teresa and that's the reason why I couldn't do a public vote for entries cos it would have been a nightmare lololol. All nominations and all public votes will be done by PM to me. Confidentiality guaranteed. xx

yeah!!!!!! are we in the house yet then I want to get me poster on the wall. catherine xx

Can I make a suggestion? As the real BB Nominations are done by secret ballot, to keep the theme here, could they be done by PM to Muffy? 2 moninations with valid reasons for nominating, with results to be announced when all housemates have nominated?

If I have forgotten to add anybody that added to the thread that wants to go in give me a yell in the next half hour and I will add you - sorry I was typing all that with kids about lol so if I missed you it wasn't deliberate I promise xx I was going to put it to the vote but with the volume of people it would have been madness trying to do that so I will save the public vote til after nominations have been made xx

where is the men sleeping he he he

Oooooh I'm in, yayyyy! Packs luxury items, 30 pairs of clean knickers, jeans, t-shirts, bras big cuddly cardigan, jumpers, jacket, hat scarf, toothbrush, make-up (not classed as luxury item it is essential you know), hairbrush, shower gel shampoo, conditioner, perfume, deodorant, toothpaste, 6 pairs of shoes, big fluffy rabbit slippers, trainers, socks, jewellery, and an apple in case Hayley is watching.

Housemate number 9 is Mystic Megabyte. Her audition also speaks volumes so I need not make any further introductions: I ''feeeeel'' as though i should be a cyber BB contestant because i am sooooooooooo in tune with the universe ! I will be a Peacemaker in the house and will weigh up who is who on the ''astrology'' front. I predict there will be lots of friction, it needs to be neutralised and harmonised and i am the only one that can do this succesfully. Megabye x ;-))) ;-))) ;-))) Hari Krishna Hari Krishna...Hari Hari...La la la la... Mystic Megabyte has yet to declare her luxury items. ------------------------------------- -------------------------------------------------- ------- Our 10th new house mate is Jackie from Wales who dumped pics of her family in favour of ciggies she is also plotting to dirnk black russians with puss *worries* lololololol Here is Jackies audition: Me me me me I want to go in I will bring peace sanity and calm to the house lol Here are Jackies luxury items: Photos of my family, cos I will miss em sob sob My 3 in 1 emoliant, so I don''t stink and my skin don''t flare up Hairdye, cos im vain Biggest bottle of Tia maria I can find, I might need it Large inflatable mallet, for when people get on my nerves lol Scrap the photos I will bring in me fags lol Jackiexx -------------------------------- -------------------------------------------------- ------------ Our 11th new housemate is a bit of a wild card lol. MONTY SMITH (seriously nervous about trying to tame this one lolol) This is Montys Audition: ok put me down, so long as they all call me SIR when talking to me Some things in life are bad They can really make you mad Other things just make you swear and curse. When you''re chewing on life''s gristle Don''t grumble, give a whistle And this''ll help things turn out for the best... These are Montys Luxury items - PMSL sun tan lotion cherry red lipstick ky jell 2doz large blue ballons bottle of TCP -------------------------------------------- -------------------------------------------------- Our twelfth house mate is Puss herself. Puss has promised to share her voddie with other housemates and cause mayhem Puss may i remind you that Big Brother is watching you at all times lol. Here is Puss''s audition:hi, im cattie im 21 my statistics are 40 / 24 /34 i have legs that go all the way up to my armpits im blonde long flowing curls i have the write shaped lips and come to bed eyes when im unhappy i suck my thumb so vote for me and i will suck your thumb Here are Puss''s luxury items: make up booze mobile (BANNED ITEM) puter (BANNED ITEM) noodles ------------------------------- -------------------------------------------------- ------------- Hopefully not unlucky for her our 13th housemate is Kris massey Kris has given a comprehensive audition so I shall let that speak for her My name is Kris I might take the p**s but you''ll be glad of me When you''re hungry Gordon Ramsey has nowt on me whan it comes to cooking I swear and curse as much as him ....And I''m better looking!! Kris has yet to submit her luxury items ---------------------------------------- -------------------------------------------------- ---- Housemate number 14 is Carol From Dulwich. Again another comprehensive audition ......... I have nothing against the youngens and I definitely think we need a few in there, but I think we need more olduns like me with bit more life experience to offer. Down-to-earth types who enjoy a laugh (and making people laugh), without needing to get it at someone else''s expense, I would like to be laughing more instead of getting caught up in constant bitchy backstabbing. Yeah it''s great to have a few hotties but how about a few old fat ones like me. (I can pretend to be young and beautiful and live a celebrity lifestyle. Vote for me.................................... Here are Carols luxury items: ear plugs Poli-Grip Denture Adhesive incontinet pads blood pressure monitor ---------------------------------------- -------------------------------------------------- ---- Bet you thought I had forgotten you didn''t you lolololol Our 15th housemate is Strump who I have a feeling is going to cause Big Brother a few problems. As before Miss Strump please do be aware that Big Brother will be watching you very carefully at all times!!! Here is Strumps audition !! lol Drops halo..............now Muffers, i can only be one lady in this..........Moi shall be the best Madam, with many *coughs* lovely gals I dont think you need me to audition this.......................... No i thought not......*to old for these poles* Strumps luxury items are Totty shoes make up hairspray hairdryer patches -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ---------------------------------------- -------------------------------------------------- -----